Life defined by Country Songs

Kenny Chesney sings:

We all have a song that somehow stamped our lives
Takes us to another place and time

Growing up in a metropolis, listening to oldies and sports talk radio, I put up a HUGE resistance to Country Music when I moved to Acadia. At first, I only listened for and admitted to liking two songs. Then I only liked Garth Brooks. By the end of first year I grudgingly admitted I was hooked. Now, it's all I listen to most days, though I still get defensive if someone says "Country Western" instead of New Country, because somehow whomever says "country Western" does so with a nasal snarl.

Here's the truth, as expressed by Trace Atkins:

cause it's songs about me
and who I am
songs about loving and living
and good hearted women and family and God

(okay, I'm not so interested in the 'good hearted women' but he needed to fill those beats).

Besides the fact that I can understand, learn and sing along with all the words - why else would you listen to music - I love the message and stories expressed by most country songs. There are a few that follow the pathetic stereotypical course of "my dog died, my truck broke down, my wife left", but those aren't the ones I'm talking about here.

I am often amazed in a way that takes my breath away and leaves tears in my eyes at how a song, written and performed by strangers, can express my own thoughts and emotions.

Trisha Yearwood sang our first waltz at our wedding:

Where your road leads
I will follow
When your heart bleeds
I'll be there for you
When your night grows dark
And you can't find your tomorrow
When you've lost sight of your dreams
Then you can follow me

and this was sung at our wedding:

Before you call my name
I will be there by your side
When your standing at the rivers edge
I will be the bridge you find

and now we find ourselves here:

Baby just look at us all this time and we're still in love
Something like this just don't exist
Between a backwoods boy and a fairy tale princess
People said it would never work out
Living our dreams and shattered all doubts
It feels good to prove 'em wrong
Living our love song
(Jason Michael Carroll)

and here:

It's the little imperfections, it's the sudden change in plans
When she misreads the directions and we're lost
But holding hands-
Yeah I live for little moments like that...
... When she steals my heart again and doesn't even know it-
Yeah I live for little moments like that
(Brad Paisley)

When I look at my recent years, there are some important dates that stand out as life altering, the obvious ones of births and deaths, but 9/11 affected me in a way I didn't expect. Alan Jackson sings:

Where were you when the world stopped turning that September day...
...Did you stand there in shock at the site of
That black smoke rising against that blue sky...

...Did you weep for the children
Who lost their dear loved ones
And pray for the ones who don't know
Did you rejoice for the people who walked from the rubble
And sob for the ones left below...

...I watch CNN but I'm not sure I can tell you
The difference in Iraq and Iran...
... Did you open your eyes and hope it never happened
Close your eyes and not go to sleep...
... Faith hope and love are some good things he gave us
And the greatest is love
The greatest is love

Since my children are the centre of my universe, I hear them whisper to me through the songs as well. Lee Ann Womack released one when I was pregnant with Jack:

I hope you never lose your sense of wonder,
You get your fill to eat but always keep that hunger,
May you never take one single breath for granted,
GOD forbid love ever leave you empty handed,
I hope you still feel small when you stand beside the ocean,
Whenever one door closes I hope one more opens,
Promise me that you'll give faith a fighting chance...

... I hope you never fear those mountains in the distance,
Never settle for the path of least resistance
Livin' might mean takin' chances but they're worth takin',
Lovin' might be a mistake but it's worth makin',
Don't let some hell bent heart leave you bitter,
When you come close to sellin' out reconsider,
Give the heavens above more than just a passing glance,
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance,

I hope you dance.

And during my most stress filled days, struggling with the twists and turns and plummets of our adoption journey, Carrie Underwood rings true:

So easy to get lost inside
A problem that seems so big, at the time
It's like a river that's so wide
And swallows you whole
While you sittin round thinking about what you can't change
And worryin' about all the wrong things
Time's flying by, moving so fast
Better make it count, cause you can't get it back

SO as you can see, country music is a lot more than wailing about dogs and trucks. Songs have defined moments in words I couldn't find, they rouse memories:

We only had a few days, and a whole lot of memories to make
Oh man we were livin, didn't waste one minute
We talked and drank and danced and said goodbye
We laughed until we cried

and give warnings:

Dog's barkin', phone's ringin'
One kid's cryin' one kid's screamin'
And she keeps apologizin'
He says they don't bother me
I've got two babies of my own
One's thirty- six, one's twenty- three
Huh, it's hard to believe
But you're gonna' miss this
You're gonna' want this back
You're gonna' wish these days
Hadn't gone by so fast
These are some good times
So take a good look around
You may not know it now
But you're gonna' miss this
(Trace Atkins)

Just like that you're six years old and you take a nap and you
Wake up and you're twenty-five and your high school sweetheart becomes your wife...
You just might miss your babies growing like mine did
Turning into moms and dads next thing you know your better half
Of fifty years is there in bed
And you're praying God takes you instead
Trust me friend a hundred years goes faster than you think
So don't blink
(Kenny Chesney)

And a reminder of a warning, Brad Paisley sings about Steve:

These days there’s dudes getting facials
Manicured waxed and botoxed
But with deep spray on tans and creamy lotioney hands
You can’t grip a tackle box
With all of these men lining up to get neutered
It’s hip now to be feminized I don’t highlight my hair
I’ve still got a pair
Yeah, honey I’m still a guy


But in the end, we're here and now and the songs that make me laugh and cry the most are the ones that ring true in the moment. The best songs capture the ordinary and illuminate the wonderment hidden within in a way that allows the listener (and car-star) to rediscover and awe in gratitude the miracles "ordinary" can comprise. Phil Vasser sings one that gets me every time:

The kids screamin', phone ringin'
Dog barkin' at the mailman bringin'
That stack of bills, overdue
Good morning, baby, how are you
Got a half hour, a quick shower
Take a drink of milk, but the milk's gone sour
My funny face makes you laugh
Twist the top on, and I put it back
There goes the washin' machine
Baby, don't kick it
I promise I'll fix it
'Long about a million other things

Well, it's okay, it's so nice
(It's) just another day in paradise
Where there's no place that
I'd rather be
Well, it's two hearts
And one dream
I wouldn't trade it for anything
And I ask the Lord every night, ooh
For just another day in paradise

n