We had hoped to have heard back from LanzhouCWI by now, but no such luck. I've had another roller coaster day - one minute I'm sure the report will be perfect, the next I'm panicked that the report will be terrible. Strangely I feel calm in the fact that if the report is not good, we will have to decline this referral - we know our limitations and are obligated to our children to make the right decision for our family. It's the uncertainty of how events will unfold that is making me looney... or at least more looney than usual.
A friend asked today what would help me destress. I feel like hiding. I feel overwhelmed to the point of being incompacitated. I want to curl up in bed, hidden away from responsibilities of home and work, watching mindless movies and sleeping at whim. The problem with that plan is, besides the obvious of being impossible, it would fail more gloriously than my Organic Chemistry exam efforts. Succumbing to my tempting bed would only allow me more time to deliberate the possible outcomes and reason out probabilities. In short, while there are moments where all I want to do is escape, it is the worst thing I could do.
So on comes another weekend. I can take a break from anticipation knowing there will be no call for the next couple of days. We have no big plans but the weather is supposed to be wonderful so we'll likely play in the yard and try to forget the world for now.
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