Ache

Some days Annawen is an idea, an abstract concept that seems like a dream I had one night. A nice idea. A wish, a hope, a prayer. We have asked, planned, paid and fought many times over to get to this point, but most of the time she seems anything but real.

Tonight in the shower, I was thinking of her, casually wondering if she's like this or like that. For a moment in my mind an image of her playing flashed. She glancing up to me with a huge grin then moved on with her game. In that flash she was suddenly a memory. Instead of a thought, wish or prayer it was real. Her sparkling eyes and enthusiastic smile were familiar, not imagined. The love in the eye contact was tangible. It made my heart ache. Ever dream a dream so wonderful that you fight waking up so you can live it a little longer? that felt so real it lingered with you throughout the day? that left you closing your eyes trying to bring back the images and feelings of your slumber?

Hold on, Little Girl, we're coming as fast as we can.

N